In response to criticism of its treatment of killer whales, Sea World said it will build them a larger habitat. When asked for comment, killer whales said, 'Hey, you know what's a larger habitat?' THE OCEAN.
Aug 19, 2014
If we truly want gender equality, we need to challenge the assumption that more is always better, and the assumption that men don’t suffer as much as women when they’re exhausted and have no time for family or fun. And we need to challenge those assumptions wherever we find them, both in the workplace and in the family. Whether it’s one more meeting, one more memo, one more conference, one more play date, one more soccer game, or one more flute lesson for the kids, sometimes we need to say, ‘Enough!'
Feb 21, 2014
CVS is no longer selling cigarettes. They say, 'It's the right thing to do for our customers and our company in their path for better health.' I go to CVS all the time. If they want to promote better health, maybe they should stop selling Cheese Whiz, Circus Peanuts, Little Debbie jelly rolls, and all the ingredients for meth.
Feb 05, 2014
No, we didn't get it cleared, but we don't get your pop flies cleared either and those go higher than this thing did.
Mar 16, 2014
On the first day, God created the navy blue blazer with brass buttons and khakis. And I looked and saw that it was not good. On the second day, He made the ill-fitting all-black suit. And I looked and saw that it was kinda bland. On the third day he created the boxy grey suit -- and things were starting to get bleak. On the fourth day, I cried. The hunt for my bar mitzvah suit was failing miserably.
Mar 21, 2014
My mother saved our home with a minimum wage job. But in the 1960s, a minimum wage job would support a family of three above the poverty line. Not today. Not even close. I understood right then that people can work hard, they can play by the rules, and they can still take a hard smack.
Apr 20, 2014
We’re definitely blessed to get a scholarship to our universities, but at the end of the day, that doesn’t cover everything. We do have hungry nights that we don’t have enough money to get food.
Mar 27, 2014
If you come to me and say, ‘Hey look I'm a racist,’ or ‘I discriminate against blacks,’ or ‘I don't like you because you're African American,’ I respect that. I can respect you more by doing that. But don't smile in my face, shake my hand, and then you don't really respect me, or want me to be around, or come to your games as the owner of the Clippers.
Apr 27, 2014
We see fans of all shapes and sizes and genders in comic stores and at conventions. And we perceived there to be a real thirst for characters that reflect what we see in the mirror. From Miles Morales, the African-American Spider-Man, to the new female Thor, our goal is to make our characters reflect the outside world.
Jul 15, 2014
A corporation is simply a form of organization used by human beings to achieve desired ends. Protecting the free-exercise rights of corporations like Hobby Lobby, Conestoga, and Mardel protects the religious liberty of the humans who own and control those companies.
Jun 30, 2014